public appearances

What exactly does it mean when the person you have been seeing makes a public appearance with your friends? Is that an automatic sign of intent to be more or merely a test to see if that person could be more? I ask only because the redhead made a very voluntary, unsolicited public appearance a couple of weeks ago. I was out with the usual crew having the usual “one drink” that had turned into an all night affair. He called and decided he was going to pick me up there and then we would hang out. As I’ve mentioned before, he is not a drinker, so it was a bit odd for him to try to mix with my very tipsy crowd. He held his own, but I resorted to literally hanging on my pseudo boyfriend Chris (Miss V’s fiancée), instead of hanging with the guy that was there to see me.

Do I have a fear of commitment? I think not. I think I only am not thinking of this guy as more than a fuck. Excuse my bluntness, but I’m trying to be honest here. He’s a nice guy, but there are no sparks going off with him. I enjoy hanging out with him, but he is not a long-term type of thing that deserves my friends’ attention. I don’t really mind the fact that they met him, especially considering the fact that they may be beginning to think my entire dating life is a sham because they never meet any of these guys; but it just doesn’t seem worth all the effort to try to mesh those two worlds until I know it is right. Or at least somewhat more worthy.

I often long for the guy that requests to hang out with my friends because he realizes how important they are to me, but at the same time, I am cautious of who I am willing to expose to that part of my life. My friends are the most important thing in my life and also the gatekeepers of my most intimate secrets. To expose an outsider to this relationship is of the most utmost seriousness to me. I know I definitely put way too much importance on this innocent maneuver, but for whatever reason, it really means a lot to me.

Maybe I should take a hint: this is most likely NOT the right guy!!!!