The X-Factor

Two dates in one week. One definitive statement that we will not date. Two possible second dates. Get lost on the math? The X factor is just that – an ex that I was never really interested in pursuing again, but he pursued me and I thought I would at least entertain it for a bit. But old habits die hard and the Bartender and I are still not compatible. Apparently, he felt my lack of enthusiasm and made me face it tonight. I only slightly hesitated when I answered that we shouldn’t date. Well, we shouldn’t. We aren’t compatible. I enjoy his company, but that is where it ends (see previous posts).

The other two newbies. Lets see … we have the Lobbyist and the Engineer. Wow, doesn’t that sound too exciting?!?!?!?!? Actually, both were quite entertaining and worthy of a second date. And both have mentioned what to do next, so I guess there will be another. Why am not really excited? I’m not sure. They are both attractive, intelligent, nice and seemingly sane. Maybe that is the problem – they are sane, and as we all know, I am not.

And here I am smiling to myself while writing this because an old unobtainable flame IMed me. I argue that it is only because he is unobtainable and that is what drives desire until you find the real thing. Then I think, maybe I really am planning my own demise. I avoid good men and am attracted to the worst and unavailable. But aren’t all women?? Only when we are young and dumb. I am too experience (i.e., old) for that crap. I can always pinpoint the wrong guys, but never the right ones.

One of my newly married friends told me that her now husband told her on her first date:

“You aren’t model hot, but there is something about you.”

If a man who says that can eventually convince the same woman to marry him, I have to believe there is hope in the world.