So Where Were We?

The holidays are such a busy time of year. Especially when you are trying to juggle family, friends, shopping, work parties, AND multiple dates. I am so behind on everything. To catch you guys up, we have three guys in the current pool: the Engineer, the Lobbyist, and Idaho Boy.

The Lobbyist has shown his age. He is only 25, but I thought was pretty mature for his age. However, he was asking to see me last week, and I only had one day available. He said ok, but that he had to meet up for a work Happy Hour first. No problem – I wanted to slip in a nap anyway (now my age is showing) and figured I had until at least 8pm. By 10 I hadn’t heard from him, ordered pizza, got in my pjs, wrote out my Christmas cards, and put in a movie. He finally sent me a text message a little after 11. Needless to say I told him he wouldn’t be seeing me that night. I have somewhat avoided him since. Don’t see much more happening there – especially considering the other two options currently available.

The Engineer is the ideal match for me. He is nice-looking, a sharp dresser, has a great personality, loves gadgets, watches Meerkat Manor, and is completely honest. Still no sparks. Then he did something a little odd: he sent a text message at 7am on Saturday morning telling me how much he enjoyed our last two dates and that he would really like to see me again before I leave town for Christmas. The fact that he sent it at 7am on a Saturday is the main concern. Not because he woke me up (which he did), but more because he had obviously been thinking about me first thing that morning. I agreed to hang out with him tonight, but I am hesitant. I like him, but I am not feeling the same way he is. Is he moving too fast for me and my feelings will eventually catch up, or am I just stringing him along knowing that sparks are usually almost immediate? As many of you have heard me say before, my Dad and Stepmom like to joke about the fact that after their first date, my Dad wrote “No sparks” in his journal. They have been happily married for 18 years. When do we know for sure?

And that leaves Idaho Boy. He doesn’t actually live in Idaho, which is good, but he does live in Delaware, which is bad. But, he has come down two weekends in a row to see me. And although his cousin lives in the area, he got a hotel room the second time and didn’t tell her he was going to be in town. So he came down just for our date. He grew up in Salt Lake City and Boise (hence the nickname). He is long distance, a complete DORK, dresses very badly and hasn’t one clue about technology – so clearly, I like him. Now he’s gone for two weeks to visit the fam on the west coast. Will absence really make the heart grow fonder or is it out of sight out of mind? I’ve gotten multiple messages from him since he left on Monday, so the former seems more likely at this point.

The X-Factor

Two dates in one week. One definitive statement that we will not date. Two possible second dates. Get lost on the math? The X factor is just that – an ex that I was never really interested in pursuing again, but he pursued me and I thought I would at least entertain it for a bit. But old habits die hard and the Bartender and I are still not compatible. Apparently, he felt my lack of enthusiasm and made me face it tonight. I only slightly hesitated when I answered that we shouldn’t date. Well, we shouldn’t. We aren’t compatible. I enjoy his company, but that is where it ends (see previous posts).

The other two newbies. Lets see … we have the Lobbyist and the Engineer. Wow, doesn’t that sound too exciting?!?!?!?!? Actually, both were quite entertaining and worthy of a second date. And both have mentioned what to do next, so I guess there will be another. Why am not really excited? I’m not sure. They are both attractive, intelligent, nice and seemingly sane. Maybe that is the problem – they are sane, and as we all know, I am not.

And here I am smiling to myself while writing this because an old unobtainable flame IMed me. I argue that it is only because he is unobtainable and that is what drives desire until you find the real thing. Then I think, maybe I really am planning my own demise. I avoid good men and am attracted to the worst and unavailable. But aren’t all women?? Only when we are young and dumb. I am too experience (i.e., old) for that crap. I can always pinpoint the wrong guys, but never the right ones.

One of my newly married friends told me that her now husband told her on her first date:

“You aren’t model hot, but there is something about you.”

If a man who says that can eventually convince the same woman to marry him, I have to believe there is hope in the world.