Some things never change

The bartender asked me out to dinner at Ceiba last weekend. Great place and the staff were phenomenal. But this isn’t a DC food blog …

He was already tipsy when I met him at the bar, which immediately put me slightly on edge. That was the one thing I could never handle about him – his inability to handle his alcohol. You would think a bartender would be the last person to get obnoxiously drunk, but not so in this case. Once we sat down to dinner, I encouraged him to eat as much as possible, but it didn’t seem to make any difference. By the end of dinner, he was well beyond tipsy and talking rather loudly. He managed to mention marriage (to me specifically) at least 10 times throughout the dinner and admitted that he made up some bogus story of finding my number transferring numbers to a new cell phone to have an excuse to call me again.

Against my better judgment, we went back over to the bar for one last drink. The GM of the restaurant was having dinner and was unfortunate enough to be exposed to my date. He managed to embarrass me, which is a big feat, I must admit – both of which was said loud enough for the entire bar to hear:

1. He told me I wanted to kiss the GM, which was pretty funny once the GM announced that he wouldn't be interested because I wasn’t playing on the right team.
2. He told the GM that we once dated (that’s a stretch) and that I broke up with him because he had a small penis (that’s not as much of a stretch).

Little does he know that I “broke up with him” because I can’t stand him after he’s been drinking. I thought I subtly implied such during dinner – making fun of him for the numerous booty calls years ago and mentioning that I never wanted anything to do with him we he came by wasted. But alas, men are not good at subtle hints, and I should have realized this.

As we were leaving, he said something rude to me. I honestly can’t remember what it was, but it wasn’t too serious because I was smiling to myself as I walked away to find my own cab home. It was just a good excuse to get out of the situation …

The 2nd Bar Exam

Today I found out that I passed the bar exam! No, not the test to see who can drink more than the rest of the bar ... I passed that one YEARS ago. I passed the lawyer bar exam - I am officially an attorney!!!! So hard to believe.

Okay, now back to dating ... assuming, of course, any man in this town would be willing to date an attorney.

The Other Shoe Always Drops

Things with Ron didn’t work out so well. Come to find out he is DEATHLY allergic to cats. The fact that he knew this but chose to come to my place anyway at first sounds admirable. But looking back, I am leaning the other direction – he knew he was allergic & that I had cats, but never said anything – a definite indication that he had no long term interest in dating me. Which is fine – like I said, he was a fun date! I contemplating keeping in touch with him for a close to home booty call, however ….

We are also talking to a couple other men, but nothing has solidified just yet. Still getting messages from Party Boy and the Bartender – somewhat surprisingly after Ms V and Ermmagirl sent the Bartender a picture of Ms V’s ass!! Soon after that, I received an invite to Paris … Ms V, you don’t give your ass enough credit!

Anchorman

I knew exactly what I was doing. In fact, I even told him I knew his antics were a ploy to get me to go back to his place. I admit my naivety in many areas of my life, but not often when it comes to dating. But, I wanted him to smooch me as much as he wanted to get me somewhere private. It’s been a while since a good first kiss, and I was craving. Not to mention he was smart, cute, had a stable career and an awesome dog, but mainly he was a lot of fun. And he has a somewhat unhealthy obsession with Ron Burgundy. I think I’m in love. Okay, not really, but it was the best first date I’ve had in a long time.

After a few drinks, he discovers I haven’t seen Anchorman yet. After recovering from shock and horror, he suggests we go to his place to watch it. Conveniently, he owns the dvd and lives a couple of blocks away. Of course I refuse, pointing to the fact that I don’t even know his last name. Then he pulls the “I have to let out my dog anyway” card. I continue to refuse, but eventually give in.

He owns a nice condo in Georgetown, but since his roommate was home and sleeping, we couldn’t watch the movie in the living room – luckily, he had a tv and dvd player in his bedroom. He may as well have been Ron Burgundy himself! I made sure to mention to him that I knew what he was doing, and he best keep his hands to himself. He was a gentleman, but I still did give up a few (or a lot) of smooches. After the movie, he walked me back to my car and texted me to be sure I made it home ok (that whole mile).

We made plans for tonight, but he called to postpone until tomorrow. He wanted to postpone due to a hangover, and I agreed because I wanted to watch the skins play the cowboys. Based on past experience, I say this kid is too good to be true. I am skeptical, but I plan to have a good time until I find the deal-breaker. The report on date 2 will be up in a few days!

Stay tuned …

Out of the woodwork …

In the past two weeks, I have been living reruns. College Boy, Party Boy, The Bartender and Prada have all initiated contact. The first three I can handle and actually would like to see – just to catch up. I am not interested in being more than friends with any of them – not that I know if they are trying for more or not. The attention is great, but somewhat uneventful. I have enjoyed catching up with old friends now that I have a little time on my hands. Because everyone else has asked recently, there are no dark horses in the running.

I am back on the online dating scene. Hopefully someone will be interesting (and interested) enough to result in a date. I have been proceeding slowly, but am looking forward to a little new social interaction. It has been a while since I have been on a date.

Stay tuned …

Retraction

I am so NOT an asshole anymore in regards to boy #2 of my last post. Turns out that he has some seriously deep-rooted anger issues that he opts to self-medicate and occasionally take out on innocent animals. More specifically, he scared my darling niece (of the canine variety) so badly that she pissed herself at the sound of his voice. I am not sure what he did, but I do know that it was unacceptable. I now feel relieved that I never returned his call.

My niece is now shacked up with me for a few days until Ms V and her hubby's new dream home is completely renovated. All is well that ends well ...

Oops, I did it again ...

Twice in one week, I found myself in a situation that, after looking back, makes me a complete asshole. Not because of anything I did, but because of what I have no intention to do later. These two men have not been so subtle about their attraction to me in the past. Not to the point of actually asking me out, but more on an attention level when we happen to be out in groups. I have had confirmation of my suspicions on both, so I’m not just being presumptuous. And I know I am not compatible with either and don’t plan to prove that fact by starting something that will inevitably end up disastrous. Considering that both are in my very close circle of friends, I shutter to think of how ugly something like that could be.

On both occasions, I had been drinking, so I didn’t want to drive home. Sensible yes, but I saw both situations coming way before my first beer. But yet, for whatever reason, I chose not to avoid the situation. No sex, no craziness, but definitely feeding the attraction and encouraging the behavior.

One I just know better than go there. Too many flashing red lights, and things I would want to change about him before he would be “datable.” All of us smart women know that is a deal breaker. Never go into a relationship thinking you can change him. You can’t. We will remain “just friends.”

The other? I am just completely not attracted to him. Not to mention he is a stiff tongue kisser – eeeewwwwww. I thought I would never meet that guy again after high school. Apparently, they still exist into adulthood. The future looks bleak. He mentioned several times before I left that we needed to hang out and that he’d call me. And he did. I haven’t returned the call yet. But I can’t decide which is worse: to call back and keep encouraging him until we inevitably go out, and I have to tell him that it isn’t going anywhere; call him back and tell him I can’t go out with him over the phone; or ignoring him until I will inevitably see him again with our friends.

Like I said, I am a complete asshole.

Transitions

Has it really been that long since my last post?? Time seems to be flying these days. It will be over a week before I even realize I have entered the next month. Time is slipping away from me. But, considering the stress of studying for the bar exam, this is probably a very good thing.

This seems to be a period of transition. I have many friends that are in major transitions of their lives. Divorces, marriages, new homes, new loves, break-ups, engagements, babies, new jobs, new relationships, etc. Maybe that's just where I am in life. I will be "thirty-something" at the end of the month. Many people, including my mother, have told me about how great the thirties are: a lot of respect professionally, decent money,but relatively little responsibility. Considering this often comes from parents who have so much more responsibility than me, I have to think the next decade can only be fabulous. Most of the transitions are positive moves, whether or not they appear pretty on the face of it. No, they all are ... I believe that everything happens for a reason and as cliche as it is, what doesn't kill us, make us stronger. And better. People who have been handed everything on a silver platter all of their lives are shallow for a reason. Not saying that it is their fault, but I'm glad I am not one of them. No education, amount of money, or book learning can replace real life experiences.

And why exactly is Jason Priestly back on television? Ah, I digress ...

The dating scene isn't so blog-worthy these days. But I really am happier than I have been in years ... maybe ever. Life seems rather easy, and I think I have it easier than most - although I'm not sure my friends agree. I am lucky. I don't deny it. Yes, I work hard, but I also fuck up as much as the next, but for some reason, I still land on top. I think it is a matter of solid values. Not values that imposed on me by work, my parents, religion, society or anything else; but values that i TRULY believe in. It doesn't matter WHAT you believe, as long as you really believe it and live it. The people that have similar values will be attracted - it is that simple. How often do you hang out with people who don't have the same baseline values as you? Not saying that you aren't different from them or chose different options than your friends, but no matter what you guys click. I like to think that the reason I have the BEST friends EVER is because I am also a good friend. It works and no matter what, these people will be by your side forever - so chose wisely and don't just follow fads - good peeps are good peeps. The most miserable people are those who don't know themselves and only follow everyone else hoping to find something that works.

All of this lofty discussion actually has a point. I am a VERY happy single woman. I take care of myself, and I like it that way. Eventually, I want something more, but now, I really like where I am and who I am. And I am so glad that a relationship does not define me. I guess my fear is that am TOO happy here and have closed the door to any serious relationship with a man because of the effort required. Why fix something that isn't broken???

Well, if for nothing else, for the sex .... oh, and so I don't have to continue to hire a husband to do the work around the house! Well, not really, but I like to keep up the hard-ass facade.